Posts Tagged ‘Darcy DeMoss’

hardbodiesSince last week’s Cheeseball Cinema film, I decided that I should keep going instead of doing it just one time and I have another good one for you guys this week. The name of today’s film is Hardbodies and it’s an 80’s instructional video on how to pick up chicks at a beach. Well, I am just kidding, but the film stars Grant Cramer (Killer Klowns From Outer Space) as Scotty, a hip and cool California beach kid. Three older guys Hunter (Gary Wood), Ashby (Sorrells Pickard), and Rounder (Michael Rapport) are having a hard time picking up ladies. One day, they see Scotty doing it and they want him to teach them the ways of picking up hardbodies (gorgeous beach girls). Everything is going great for all of them until Hunter puts a move on Scotty’s girl Kristi (Teal Roberts). Now he has to teach them a lesson they’ll never forget. The film also stars Courtney Gains (Children Of The Corn) as Rad, Cindy Silver as Kimberly, Kristi Somers (Rumble Fish) as Michelle, Crystal Shaw Martell (Hard Rock Zombies) as Candy, Darcy DeMoss (Can’t Buy Me Love) as Dede, Kane Hodder (Friday The 13TH Part VII) as Older Geek, Kathleen Kinmont (Halloween 4: The Return Of Michael Myers) as Pretty Skater, and the film was directed by Mark Griffiths (Hardbodies 2).

The Girls Of HardbodiesAs you can see from above, the film featured a lot of who’s who of actors from the horror genre like Kathleen Kinmont and Kane Hodder (he’s briefly in the film). It also featured a lot of the actors who kind of flew under the radar in the 80’s and 90’s being in cool movies and such. So, you’re probably wondering about what I thought about this film and the answer is simple. Unlike last week’s film which was just an excuse to show T&A with a horrible story and acting, this week’s film actually had a story, good acting, lots of T&A. There is enough T&A in this film to please anyone even Mr. Skin. The thing that got me was even though there were some cheesy sequences, there was some really good acting involved in this film and the story didn’t bore me to death. One of the other cool things about this film is the fact that they have 80’s all female rock band Vixen in the film as the band Hardbodies. I was looking through the cast on IMDB and saw the name Vixen on it and freaked. The soundtrack even features a few songs from the band on as well as Gerard McMahon (The Lost Boys). It was a fun film overall and I definitely recommend checking it out. On a scale of one being close to an A-List Hollywood film and five being the cheesiest film of all time, I would have to give the film an 2.5 because it wasn’t bad. Check it out on Youtube right now!!!

Night LifeWe are rolling right through with more horror films for Cheeseball Cinema cause we all know there are tons of them. For this week’s Cheeseball Cinema film, we are looking at a very different zombie film than most of you are used to with the 1989 film Night Life which was directed by David Acomba (Hank Williams: The Show He Never Gave). The film centers around Archie (Scott Grimes), a nerd in a small town who is looking to get out of the town by getting into college. The only problem is that he can’t afford school so he works at his Uncle’s Mortuary in order to do so. Did I mention, that there a couple of jocks and there girlfriends who terrorize him any chance they get? After a prank, the four kids are involved in an automobile accident and they end up at the mortuary where Archie works. One night, lightning strikes the house and it brings the back to life where they continue to terrorize poor Archie. The film also stars John Astin (Return Of The Killer Tomatoes!) as Uncle Flanders, Cheryl Pollak (My Best Friend Is A Vampire) as Charly, Anthony Geary (UHF) as John, Alan Blumenfeld (Righteous Kill) as Frank, Kenneth Ian Davis (Porky’s II: The Next Day) as Rog, Darcy DeMoss (Friday The 13TH Part VI: Jason Lives) as Roberta, Lisa Fuller (The Monster Squad) as Joanie, Mark Pellegrino (The Number 23) as Allen, and Phil Proctor (Toy Story) as Randolph Whitlock.

night life 3All I can really say about the film is that it is very unique in a way and it has some interesting differences than most zombie films. First off, it’s almost an hour in to the film before anyone becomes a zombie and the film is only 1 and 28 minutes long. The film also has a very unique scene in that it has a zombie sex scene. Don’t worry, it doesn’t show anything, but it’s implied when you see Archie under the bed and the bed is rocking. The zombies are also a lot different in this film than most because they are not slow and they are not asking for brains. They actually move like humans, they drive cars, and they are just as sadistic dead as they were alive in this film. For those wondering if there is any T&A in this film, there is not and in fact the only thing you get to see is Lisa Fuller in some black lingerie. It’s an interesting take on the zombie genre for those who are interested. The acting was pretty good especially from John Astin who plays a good asshole Uncle with your future in his hands. The only problem I had with the film was some of the interactions between Grimes character and some of the bullies. Other than that I didn’t really find too much wrong with the film to begin with. Check it out for yourself on Youtube as we speak. On a scale of one being close to an A-List Hollywood film and five being the cheesiest film of all time I am going to give this one a 2.1 for a final grade.