Eddie’s 31 Days Of Halloween 2016: Day 9: The Gallows (2015)

I was dying to watch this film The Gallows last year, but when the time for Eddie’s 31 Days Of Halloween came around, it was available anywhere for me to watch it. Now that I found the film available on demand, I decided to watch it for today’s film. Back in the early 1990’s, Beatrice High School attempted to put on a play called The Gallows, but tragically it claimed the life of student Charlie Grimille (Jesse Cross) when the gallow gives way and he was hung to his death. Now 20 years later and the school is trying to put the production back into work with the current crop of students. Reese Houser (Reese Mishler) is having a hard time remembering his lines for the play so he his best friend Ryan (Ryan Shoos) has the bright idea of trying to sabotage the play, but something sinister lurks as the hangman returns to claim his revenge. The film also stars Cassidy Gifford (God’s Not Dead) as Cassidy, Travis Cluff (The Measure Of A Man) as Mr. Schwendiman, Price T. Morgan (The Flip Side) as Stage Boy, Theo Burkhardt (Picture Perfect) as Rick Houser, Alexis Schneider (Con Killer) as Actress In Play, and the film was directed by Cluff and Chris Lofing (Kid HULK).

I didn’t know going into this film that it was a found footage film so if you are not a fan of those types of films then I do not blame you for missing this one. The Gallows is one of those films where it’s a cool idea at the time, but the execution was just horrible. All of my friends that had seen this film told me to avoid it, but it was one of those films where curiosity definitely killed the cat. I had to watch it for myself to see whether they were right or not and they were definitely right. The famous scene in the trailer with Kathy Lee Giffords daughter where she is just sitting there (see picture to the left) before she is taken by the hangman. Yeah, the scene wasn’t as cool as it seemed in the trailer. This is probably my least favorite Blumhouse film made so far. Even though the film’s tragedy is set in the 90’s and takes place today, the film was almost like an homage to classic 80’s horror where a tragedy takes place in a school (e.g. Return To Horror High, Slaughter High). Even though, it tried to be like those films, they didn’t execute properly like those films did. The acting is pretty decent, but if you do not like shaky cameras and unsteady shots then do not watch this one. I am going to give The Gallows an C- for a final grade.

Eddie’s 31 Days Of Halloween 2014: Day 26: Open House (1987)

Thanks to Netflix, I am discovering more and more horror movies to watch everyday. They are widening their selection of slasher flicks all the time, so I stumbled upon this suggestion that Netflix made for me after I watched Return To Horror High. In Los Angeles, a man is killing off real estate agents (and very good looking females) at open houses any chance he can get. The killer then decides to call a local radio psychologist (Joseph Bottoms)to indulge in the murders he is committing. So, with the help of the talk show jock, the police are aided as they try to catch the killer before he kills anyone else. The movie also stars Adrienne Barbeau (Swamp Thing) as Lisa, Rudy Ramos (Colors) as Rudy, Mary Stavin (Octopussy) as Katie, Tiffany Bolling (The Candy Snatchers) as Judy Roberts, Stacey Adams (Defense Play) as Tracey, Robert Miano (Fast And Furious) as Shapiro, and Darwyn Swalve (Heartbreak Ridge) as Harry.

First off I want to say that for some reason it seems that serial killers have a fascination with kittens or at least it seems that way. In Crawlspace, he loved his cat and just before the killer in this film is about to kill the only full nude woman in the whole film, he stops to pet a kitten. The acting in this film is a little cheesy, the only good actors were Barbeau and Bottom, but the kills in the film are very creative. He ties one woman up, dumps champagne all over her, connects two wires to her chest, and plugs the other end into a wall socket and turns on the electricity. He hangs one woman near the main window of a house and for most of the film you only see either his boots or his hands. It’s not the greatest slasher movie in the world, but it works and what the heck it’s the 80′s after all. Barbeau is actually pretty foxy in this film in that cougar kind of way, that was a plus. My final grade for the film is a modest C+ and I will say that it is worth checking out cause after all everyone is just dying to get in.

Cheeseball Cinema: Return To Horror High (1987)

I remember seeing this on the television channel Chiller, the only problem was I never stuck around to watch the whole entire film. So, I decided for today’s Cheeseball Cinema entry that I was going to re-tackle this corny low budget 80′s horror film that has a slight comedy twist to it. A film crew has set up shop at an old high school that had been shut down due to some grisly murders that went unsolved. The film crew plans to film a movie about the mystery of the murders. The only problem is that the crew is having trouble filming it thanks to the return of the killer. Now, one by one the whole entire crew is getting hacked to pieces. The film stars Lori Lethin (The Wave) as three different characters, a young George Clooney, Vince Edwards (The Killing) as Richard, Panchito Gómez (Selena) as Choo Choo, Brendan Hughes (The Howling VI: The Freaks) as Steven, Scott Jacoby (Our Winning Season) as Josh, Maureen McCormick (The Brady Bunch) as Officer Tyler, Philip McKeon (976-Evil II), and Alex Rocco (The Godfather) as Harry.

As I said above, this movie was a total cheesefest and it wasn’t even a good one. Good cheese ball films have plenty of breasts and this only has it in the beginning. It was almost as if they were trying to be a serious contender, but besides everything I said, I did enjoy watching the film. Some of the kill scenes were kind of cool and some of them lacked because they didn’t show you anything. My favorite had to be while the film crew was shooting a scene, the professor gets his heart ripped out. I’m not going to give away the ending of the film, but that I admit it was pretty impressive. Some of the acting is terrible and some of it is actually pretty decent. I felt Marcia Brady’s acting was just too much, it was like she was trying too hard. She overacted the role like William Shatner does to most of his roles that he gets. One thing you’ll notice is that this is the second time George Clooney has appeared in Cheeseball Cinema. You have to get your start somewhere in the business. So on a scale of 1 being an A-list Hollywood film and 5 being the cheesiest film of all time I am going to give this film a 3.5 for a final grade.

Cheeseball Cinema: 976-EVIL 2 (1992)

For tonight’s Cheeseball Cinema, I wanted to check out the sequel to the original film that was directed by Robert Englund in 976-EVIL 2 with this one being directed by Jim Wynorski (Chopping Mall). 976-EVIL is basically a phone number that you call and it gives you supernatural powers with the only side effect being you turn into a satanic killer. So, the sequel is about a college professor who took quite the obsession with the phone number and the promise that it gave him that he turns into a killer, but he gets caught. Thanks to his powers, he is allowed to leave his body to kill off any witnesses their maybe to his murder and to get closer to his former assistant Robin (Debbie James). The only problem is that she gets the visions, but no one but a biker named Spike (Patrick O’Bryan) believes her. The film also stars René Assa (Deep Cover) as Mr. Grubeck, Philip McKeon (Return To Horror High) as Taylor, Leslie Ryan (Night Of The Creeps) as Paula, Karen Mayo-Chandler (Hard To Die) as Laurie, George ‘Buck’ Flower (They Live) as Turrell, and a special appearance from Brigitte Nielsen (Cobra).

If you’re looking for the a-typical sex scenes that horror movies always provided then you are the proverbial sh** out of luck on this one. This isn’t most solid horror film, but it features a quick shower scene right in the beginning of the film followed by Karen Mayo-Chandler running through the halls basically with a wet t-shirt. Some of the kill scenes in this film are actually pretty creative as we have the exploding body that was just hit by a mack truck. We have one girl get zapped into It’s A Wonderful Life and she’s enjoying it until they all turn to zombies. Some of the out of body effects that Gruber goes through are a little cheesy and there’s a couple of scenes that just make you scratch your head, but otherwise I enjoyed it. It was cool to see Brigitte Nielsen in this film because she still looked sexy as hell in this film as an Elvira type store owner of the a-typical looking voodoo 80’s store. This film is definitely worth taking a look at. So, on a scale from 1 being close to an A-List Hollywood film and 5 being the cheesiest film of all time I am going to give this film a 2.5 on the scale.

Cheeseball Cinema: Bloody Birthday

Courtesy of wikipedia

For this week’s edition of Cheeseball Cinema comes a tale of three kids all born seconds apart from each other on the same day during a solar eclipse. I was under the impression that a woman had triplets, but it was 3 different women. The film then goes forward ten years and these little bastards are about to turn 10, the only problem is that instead of playing normal games like every other kid, they like to murder people for fun. Apparently, the reason they commit murders is that they consciences because they were born during a solar eclipse. Sounds like a bunch of crap to me! The movie stars a young Julie Brown, yeah that Julie Brown from Earth Girls Are Easy or the gym teacher in Clueless. The film also stars Billy Jayne (Parker Lewis Can’t Lose) as Curtis, Elizabeth Hoy (The Blues Brothers) as Debbie, Lori Lethin (Return To Horror High) as Joyce, K.C. Martel (The Amityville Horror) as Timmy, Andrew Freeman (The Magical World of Disney) as Steven, Susan Strasberg (Scream Of Fear) as Miss Viola Davis, Melinda Cordell (The Edge Of Night) as Mrs. Brody, Joe Penny (Cold Case) as Mr. Harding, Bert Kramer (Volcano) as Sheriff Brody, and the film was directed by Ed Hunt (Plague).

If your looking for the stuff that I also like about this cheesy 80’s movies, this film has it. Right off the bat, the first scene takes place in a graveyard which in horror films in the 80’s, seems to be the place to make out with your girlfriend. To make matters worse, the couple decides to climb into a freshly dug grave and that is where they plan to have sex. What Idiots, that is just asking to be taken out right off the bat. Before the 15 minute mark in the film, you get to see Julie Brown do a little striptease. Later on in the film, you get a full nude scene before one of these bastard kids decides to take them out. In this film, the kids are vicious and relentless.  They seem to have fun doing what it is their doing. The only thing I don’t understand is the end. One of the mothers of the kids is distraught over the death of her husband, her child is a murderer, and I can’t give away the ending. So you’ll have to check it out for yourself. On a scale of 1 being close to an A-List film and 5 being the cheesiest film of all time, I give this movie a 2.5. It’s a decent film, you should see it for yourself on Netflix.